Doubts and Trips

When I first started doing my reading for class, I was unsure how much I was going to like my program. Of course, a lot of it has to do with the fact that I've moved away from everyone I know to get my degree, so I started to wonder if I'd made the right decision (and if I could really commit my life to studying all of this).

And then I had my first class. I love it. I love talking about it. I love teaching some of what I've learned to fellow classmates and discussing Scottish literature with them and the professors I have. It's a little more awkward to answer the question "Why Scottish literature?" when one of the church members or other people ask, but it's so much fun to discuss it with classmates.

I have a tendency to get obsessed with something, but it always dies out. In high school, it was Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Spanish history and language, oboe, etc. I was afraid that my "obsession" with Scottish lit might have run its course as well. And yea, some of the stuff that I'm reading for class isn't my favorite, but I'm sure I can continue in the field for the rest of my life. It really is fascinating to me. Unlike my childhood obsessions, I think this one is permanent. I have a pretty good idea of what my master's dissertation will be on, and I know what I want to do for my doctoral thesis. Whether or not I finish school in Scotland is a question I don't know the answer to yet, but I'm sure I'll learn before too long.

Next month I've got some fun activities to look forward to. Towards the end of October, we have a seminar going at the Uni for Scottish Gothic, and since I'm a postgrad student, I get to go for free! Muahahaha. The English department is also organizing a night out in Edinburgh where we'll go see a production of Hogg's Confessions of a Justified Sinner and do a pub dinner. This could be expensive, but the great thing is that the department is helping out, so I only have to pay a few pounds. I kind of love being a graduate student.